monkey nonsense

i work in the city. i live in the suburbs. according to the wmata website, my metro ride should only take 24 minutes… on a daily basis, it’s usually a bit more… maybe 30 minutes? just because when there’s a lot of people, it takes longer for them to all get aboard and for the doors to close.

this past friday, i was eager to get home so that i could depart for my weekend trip to pittsburgh. i ended up skipping out on my big boss’ 50th bday celebration to get onto the metro before 5:30 with hopes of being home close to 6 and hitting the road before 7. i get to the station a little after 5:15. the screen tells me a train is to come in 4 minutes… not too bad. i’ve waited much longer for trains during rush hour. so i wait.

the train arrives and to my surprise, it is a 8-car train! 8 cars! sweeeeet, looks like this commute is going to be awesome! typical metro trains only have 6 cars. there are even some 4 car trains which are absolutely ridiculous to have during rush hour, but metro still tries some times. i get onto the first car of the train and find that it is comfortably empty… i still don’t get a seat, but at least no one is violating my personal space.

so we’re chugging along, everything going smooth. when, at the 2nd stop after i get on, we stop at the platform for an obscenely long time. i’m not sure what is going on since it appears everyone on the platform has boarded and we’re just waiting for the door to close. soon, the operator gets on the intercom and announces asks that anyone whose door will not open to move to another door. deh?? doors not opening?? but metro opens doors ™! how can this be? she announces a few more times, but i guess the malfunctioning doors might completely close off one train, thereby preventing passengers from moving to another open door… so she comes out of her “cockpit” to go open the doors for them.

Metro Alerts sends this message:
(ID 35433) Minor delay between Rosslyn and Ballston towards Vienna/Fairfax-GMU..

15 minutes later, we depart the station and are again on our way. at this point, i’m still hoping to leave before 7 because i’ve “only” been delayed 15 minutes… we make one more prolonged stop a few stations down… apparently the operator, in rescuing the passengers in the malfunctioning car, asked anyone getting off before the end of the line to move off the malfunctioning car so that she wouldn’t have to repeated stop at each station to let them off. some people apparently didn’t hear… so she gets off to open the door for them again really quickly.

now, only 2-3 more stops before my stop and above ground now… we come to a stop. everyone groans. the operator announces that a switch seems to be improperly set so she’s going to hop off the train for 2-3 minutes to switch it before we’re on our way again. my question is… it is now nearly 6pm. rush hour has been going on for at least 2 hours now… and we’re the first train to run across this switch malfunction?! or did someone just switch it to the wrong setting just as we were approaching?!

but of course, the “2-3″ minutes becomes quite longer as the switch proves to be uncooperative and she needs to call for maintenance people to take a look. we sit and wait. at this point in time, i guess they told the trains behind us that we’re stuck and so they switch to the other, wrong side of the tracks to pass us. a train passes us on the left. i get more frustrated. i’m within sight of the station… why can’t i just get off and walk and wait for the next passing train to pick me up?!

Metro Alerts sends this message:
(ID 35434) Minor delay at East Falls Church in both directions. (Switch malfunction-trains are sharing the same track between East Falls Church and Ballston-MU.).

we wait around for longer. the operator announces that she’s going to go back to the station before and switch to the other side of the tracks so that we can progress. she then comes out of her “cockpit” and starts to make her way to the end of the train so that she can begin to drive it in the other direction. more minutes pass.

Metro Alerts now sends this message:
(ID 35434) Major delay at East Falls Church in both directions. (Switch malfunction-trains are sharing the same track between East Falls Church and Ballston-MU.).

from the train’s other end’s cockpit, she now announces that she doesn’t have permission to take the train back to the station before. and that she is awaiting a supervisor to come look at the situation.

another train passes us on the left side.

the train operator reappears at my end of the train. i guess turning around and going to the station before isn’t going to happen. we see through the window that workers are working on our switch… but ever so slowly.

another train passes us on the left side… that makes 3 trains!

FORTY FIVE minutes later, the switch is finally operational and we’re FINALLY moving.

total time lost on the metro: 1 hour and 35 minutes. i got home at 7pm. A HOUR of my life… GONE!